Mr. Worldwide! Red 1
Got my very own song!
Nobody else. Just me, estas chicas, Dali Vodka, a snake, 305
and as always
Dale!
Here's a special song, I made it just for you
Did it all by myself, it's my solo debut
This time it's all mine, I'm a rhyme ryhmes that don't rhyme
I think it sounds fine, and no one else seems to mind
No more splittin' my checks up, I've made it to Mecca!
"Dónde esta la biblioteca?"
I'm just kiddin' I don't read
Now... what... to... rap... about?
MARC ANTHONY
Since J-Lo said goodbye
all I do is cry
and watch romantic comedies
PITBULL
C'mon man, we already did that song!
MARC ANTHONY
Why ay ay is she dating that young guy?
My kids tell me he's muy sexy
PITBULL
You're messin' up my track Marc Anthony
PITBULL
I said you could crash for a week not a year
You ruined my sofa, it's stained with your tears
C'mon Marc I don't have time fer all dat
you're bound to find a booty that's just as fat
Have a Dali Vodka while I do my thang
If you a good boy we'll go to PF Chang's
Ha! more like PF Cha ching
Tally!
MARC ANTHONY
I just can't leave her behind
I wish I could turn back time
but I don't have the technology
PITBULL
Knowledge!
MARC ANTHONY
Hey why ay ay ay does your mouth go to the side?
PITBULL
Shut up!
MARC ANTHONY
... now even Pitbull's mad at me
PITBULL
I forgive you
You a rockstar man, and you almost handsome
We'll hit the club later, but you gotta put pants on
Lemmie rock this solo then we'll go hit the floor (ding dong)
Hang on for a sec lemmie just get the door
J-LO
Hey Pitbull Imma keep it short
I just came by to get Marc's child support
PITBULL
Oh Marc Anthony? Oh he disappeared
he's definitely not anywhere around here
J-LO
Cut the mierda, I know you're not alone
I can smell his nasty Brut cologne
Also the kids have to go to the dentist
I'll be too busy on Celebrity Apprentice
PITBULL
Donald!
MARC ANTHONY
I-I-I want to know when your heart died
J-LO
Don't take another step towards me
PITBULL
Both of you stop it, can't you just get along?
Come into my office and sit on the futon
Have a Bud Light and have yourselves a seat
Tell me your problems but do it to the beat
J-LO
He dresses like he on Fantasy Island
MARC ANTHONY
She's a fashion monster fueled by diamonds!
PITBULL
I know how this relationship went off track
I've carefully researched and weighed all the facts
See J-Lo's much more attractive than you
She a ten, you a two, let me get you a tissue
Sure you got the money and all them Latin Grammys
But you look like a hispanic Steve Buscemi
J-Lo
Who's that?
PITBULL
He played in Fargo
J-Lo
Oh my god, he does!
PITBULL
Now if you'll excuse me I got a solo to fix
STUDIO GUY
Sorry Mr. Bull I have to be home by six
PITBULL
Say what? DAAAAAAAAALE!